To paraphrase Jeff Foxworthy, you know you’re old when—
1. You’ve never heard of half the shows nominated at the Emmys.
2. You sit down to put your shoes on.
3. You think TikTok is a new clock.
4. You remember when Amazon only sold books.
5. You’re phone takes you aside, and says, “Look, we’re really sorry. We know you’re one of the dinosaurs who still buys music on Google Play, but we’re switching over to YouTube music.” And you say, “YouTube has music?”
Excuse me, but—I’m old.