It Takes a Village

The old adage, It takes a village to raise a child, has never been more true than now.

Graeme and Simon Berney-Edwards of Redhill, Surrey, England are the proud fathers of two-year-old twins. They have the family they always wanted, but it wasn’t easy and they didn’t get there on their own.

Picture submitted by Simon Berney-Edwards to CBC News.

The first step in their journey to fatherhood took them to an in vitro fertilization clinic in Las Vegas and eggs from an anonymous donor.

Step two had the couple looking to Canada for a surrogate, Canadian laws governing surrogacy being more progressive than those in the U.K.

Enter Meg Stone of Hamilton, Ontario. Meg was up for the challenge of carrying twins, half-siblings, one fathered by Graeme, one by Simon.

All in all, it took two women and two men across three countries to make the Berney-Edwards dream of a family come true.

Submitted by Simon Berney-Edwards to CBC News

It takes a village 🙂

Aimer at Amazon

Advertisements

Long Lost

A Cambridge University student, while doing research on the British poet Siegfried Sassoon, has found buried treasure. A poem penned to Sassoon’s boyfriend, Glen Byam Shaw.

Written in 1925, when homosexuality was still a crime in the U.K., perhaps the omission of pronouns is more than a matter of poetic style.

Not a blast from the past, but a sigh…

Untitled poem
Though you have left me, I’m not yet alone:
For what you were befriends the firelit room;
And what you said remains & is my own
To make a living gladness of my gloom
The firelight leaps & shows your empty chair
And all our harmonies of speech are stilled:
But you are with me in the voiceless air
My hands are empty, but my heart is filled.
Copyright Siegfried Sassoon by kind permission of the Estate of George Sassoon

Aimer at Amazon

Pride

As Toronto gears up for the Pride parade this weekend, I’ve been hearing a lot about a group who feel left out, overlooked. Apparently, these people have been victimized by those of us who strive for an inclusive society with equality for all.

They’re asking for their own parade, calling it STRAIGHT PRIDE. How they can even say the words with a straight face is beyond me!

Not that I’m surprised, we’ve heard this kind of garbage before, white men complaining about how rough they have it because minorities and women are getting all the good jobs. Please! Pass the hat, let’s help these poor souls out.

There are a lot of comments out there on the request for a Straight Pride parade in Boston. Here’s one of my favourites:

Will a Straight Pride parade ever happen? I’m thinking not, but the fact that some people think it should… There are still a few holdouts who believe the earth is flat, doesn’t make them right.

Aimer at Amazon

A Lifetime

Is it the same?

After all this time, are we the same?

I don’t know. How would I know? How can I compare who we are now with who we were then…?

The years rolled on, shit happened. Evasions. Lies. Large and small hurts delivered in anger and in silence.

Shared memories and secret smiles. Mornings rushing around or sleeping in. Frenzied days and wild nights. Laughter … I don’t have to try to remember the laughter because we laugh still you and I.

I wasn’t looking to get married all those years ago, not that we could back then. I was looking to get laid and so were you…

And here we are, forty years on. Thinning hair, and rounding shoulders, and still looking to each other—to get laid.

The Interview

He should have lied.

The minute Jared got a look at the man on the other side of the desk, he should have made up some excuse and got the hell out of there, but…

He had student loans to pay, and he was fed up with the short-term contract jobs, and he really needed to move out of his parents’ place —

“U of T,” Nicholas Allan Noyes, President and CEO said, reading from the resume in front of him. “Master of Arts in Ancient History.”

“Yes.”

Jared didn’t add a sir to the yes because this wasn’t the military, he wasn’t a freaking boy scout, and — bullshit. He didn’t say sir because, oh God, he so wanted to.

“Latin?” Noyes asked. “Bet that comes in handy.”

“Not so far.”

That got him a smile. Fortunately, it was there and gone in a nanosecond because Jared couldn’t think when Noyes smiled at him. He was having enough trouble concentrating even without the smile. Concentrating on anything, but the fact that there was something about this guy that just flat-out did it for him. Something? Hah! Make that everything. The air of command, the stone jaw… God, even his hands—

“I see you’ve moved around a bit since graduation,” Noyes said, tapping the resume.

“Yes, contract work mostly. I’d like to find a more permanent home.”

With you, Jared thought, but he didn’t say that. He wasn’t psychotic.

Noyes sat back in his high-backed, high-tech, black leather throne, Siberian blue eyes regarding Jared across the expanse of the polished slab of wood between them. “And what makes you think you’d be an asset to MicroSource?”

Jared trotted out his customary spiel, trying to sound intelligent when all he really wanted to know was what Noyes looked like under that bespoke suit and if he had a chance in hell of finding out …

Aimer at Amazon

Because It’s Right

Life has gotten complicated. With new options come new questions… and new answers.

My daughter has two children, they both call her Daddy — because my daughter’s wife is Mommy.

Takes a bit of getting used to, doesn’t it?

From multi-generational, to nuclear, to blended, the concept of family continuously evolves, as we evolve.

Oftentimes, the law is slow to adapt to these changes, but in California this week they got it right.

Aidan Dvash-Banks, born in Canada to American and Israeli fathers, (Andrew and Elad Dvash-Banks) had been granted U.S. citizenship. His twin brother, Ethan Dvash-Banks had not.

At first glance, this doesn’t seem blatantly discriminatory, or it doesn’t if you don’t know much about citizenship law which I don’t. It seems logical that the biological son of the American gets citizenship status and the biological son of the Israeli doesn’t…

Yeah, no.

If Andrew had married a woman both boys would have been granted citizenship. The government failed to recognize the Dvash-Banks marriage as legitimate. They applied a born out of wedlock policy to the twin boys.

Fortunately, District Judge John F. Walter explained to the U. S. government where they had gone wrong.

Both boys have now been granted citizenship and the family is healthy, and happy, and living in L.A.

Boys

Family is about heart, some people know that 🙂

Aimer at Amazon

Standing Guard

There’s a line in our national anthem…

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee

To my mind, those words aren’t about protecting our borders — they’re about protecting each other.

We are Canada.

All of us.

Unfortunately, we here in Ontario have been caught asleep at our posts. The conservative provincial government has rolled back sex education to where it stood in 1998.

They scrapped the sex ed program the liberals put in place in 2015 because apparently,  our kids don’t have to learn about consent, same-sex relationships, gender identity, online bullying or sexting.

Did I mention masturbation? 

No? Neither does Doug Ford’s 1998 retro program.

British Columbia, marching to the beat of different drummer, stands on guard for all its students.

Unlike Ontario, B.C. is not trying to turn the clock backward.  In 2016, they instituted SOGI — sexual orientation and gender identity program — with the goal of helping LGBTQ students and ending bullying based on gender identity.

Is the B.C. government getting flak from some parents and religious groups arguing that SOGI is “sexualizing our kids” and “telling them they are gender fluid”? Yes.

There were dueling rallies on the lawn of the legislature this past September, groups for and against SOGI shouting over each other.

Is the government backing down? No.

The province is committed to ensuring that every school is a safe space for all children.

The license plate says it all — Beautiful British Columbia.

Gay Pride In Canada Concept Image - Gay Pride Rainbow Flag And T

Aimer at Amazon